Back in August I posted this, knowing on the periphery of my mind that 27 had the possibility to be a year of intense change. Nothing was concrete yet, but the inklings of a major shift in the status quo had begun to pass through my day-to-day life.
Three months later and everything has been aligned, cemented and now November (what's left of it) and December will be filled with preparations for a rather monumental journey.
On December 31, A and I will be moving to Lausanne Switzerland for work, return date unknown. Even as I am typing this, the words are not yet registering in my brain as being true. These kinds of adventures happen to other people, far more interesting and adventurous people than a homebody and bookworm such as myself. But even as I fail to comprehend the realness of it, there is the piece of paper on my desk defying my incredulous reaction to the situation. Girl, you are going. Better start packing those bags.
This process has been long and fraught with anxiety, disappointment and (ultimately) exhilaration. Even when the conversations began in earnest back in August, it was hard to accept the situation with any sort of finite possibility. I have always been a worst case scenario person, a closet optimist who spends a significant amount of time grappling with the very real possibility of defeat, while a tiny, hope-filled balloon tries to stay afloat in the face of my overbearing pessimism. With the signing of the papers, the tether of worry binding that balloon to the earth was cut free and has started tentatively floating upward, gathering speed and volume and beginning to grasp the infinite possibilities of the future.
A future filled with excitement. Exploration. The most tantalizing unknown experiences.
December 16th is the date I drive out of this beautiful city that I have called home for almost four years. Chicago, we have had such a relationship. I have grown up here and started the foundation of a life that I am so excited to call my own. There are so many nooks and crannies of this city that I will miss dearly. And please let's not talk about the people. Not just yet. The thought of leaving the wonderful people I have had the sheer joy to meet and laugh and play and cry and work with here is too much to handle right now.
Oh, the goodbyes will come. They have to. But not yet.
I can't believe this is happening.